This is the 1st time feeling so sian after talking to him. I know it's my fault that I've gone clubbing. However, I felt that he did not realised the days when I had to reject severals invitations. If I wan, I could hav gone many times rather than just once.
He kept on repeating about the bad times he had been through in his previous relationship. However, he din realise that everytime he said it, it makes me feel that I am not difference from his ex gf. I thought if his mum doubts me it wun be a big prob coz as long as darling trust me I'm happy. But I realised that's not the case now. Why can't he just say "No worries. I trust you darling." If he's not going to look forward towards our relationship but backwards and sees me as another gal similar to her ex.. I feel like giving up already. I can't imagine in years to come when he's going to say the same thing again and again. We hav been together for 7 months already!! I can't take it.
If I wan, I can also say that what is happening to me now is the same as what has happened during my previous relationship. When he doesn't wan to trust me, doesn't not appreciate my efforts. I also dun wan the same old cycle to happen again. I had enough of it the last 3 yrs.. thinking of it makes me wanna cry again.. sianz!
Lynn juz msg me that she's not going jogging already. Haiz.. I'm so sian with my life suddenly. So unhappy.. Life like I say.. meaningless sometimes. Jason and I talked on the phone just now. Acting as though nothing happened. I hate that! the prob will always remains.. nv go away..